Monday, August 27, 2012

Good GRIEF!!!

I have been really having a hard time getting over the loss of our baby...it isn't like me to be so sullen all the time. I try to shake it off. I have so very much to be thankful for and I have a wonderful husband and children who really need me to take care of them.

I went to the gym everyday last week and I started eating so much healthier. By Friday morning when I was at the gym I just about lost it. I was having a slow workout and I just couldn't stop thinking, "Why am I here? What am I doing? Just last month I couldn't stop smiling, I was so excited that my pregnancy was going so great! I ate everything all the time, I slept in, I took naps everyday, I went to bed early...now I get up at 4:45am to workout and am only eating healthy food...and I can't even make myself smile!"

Then came a busy weekend as I took my daughter and her friends away...now it is Monday again...this time I started my morning off with going to Adoration. I just sat in the chapel and cried. I am so glad that during this grief I can turn to my Lord and my husband...both who have been very patient with me! I got in the car to go home and thought...let me put on the christian radio station...that usually encourages me and makes me smile...so when I did, one of my favorite songs came on that really fit my situation perfect!

.

Newsboys Blessed Be Your Name Lyrics

Blessed be Your name
In the land that is plentiful
Where your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
But my heart will choose to say
You give and take away
You give and take away
But my heart will choose to say

Blessed it be your of the lord
Blessed it be your name
Bless it be your name of the lord
Bless it be your glorious name

Blessed it be your name of the lord
Blessed it be your name
Blessed it be your name of the lord
Blessed it be your glorious name
THY WILL BE DONE!!! +JMJ+

4 comments:

Drina said...

I'm not a huge Christian radio fan, but I LOVE that son. "You give and take away...Blessed be your name!" How perfect. God bless you, Sam!

Maurisa said...

:(

Hang in there, Sam. I'm still praying for you. Even offered my mass for your consolation yesterday. Healing will take time, but it will come. (((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

Do not dispair! The Lord is not done working through you. Favorite quote from favorite movie, "when the Lord closes a door, somewhere He opens a window."

Robin E. said...

I'm still praying for you, too, and offer my communion, sufferings, etc. for you. Keep leaning on our Lord.